Ego is fear.
Ego is attachment.
Ego is defense.
Ego is the desire to look good and do it right depending on what you were praised for as a child.
Ego is every defense mechanism you have ever displayed.
Ego always thinks in absolutes.
Ego believes whatever you are experiencing in this moment is permanent.
Ego cannot express creativity because ego is set in its determinism of the world.
Ego sees everything as separate and in competition.
Ego is constantly projecting the past onto the future as a way to perpetuate the illusion that you need its protection.

Your ego is not your enemy.

To believe the ego is something to fight, resist, and reject is simply another manifestation of the same illusion of separation that created the ego.

Your ego is a part of you.

Just like every part of you is worthy and deserving of love, so too is your ego, especially so.

The ego is developed as we experience praise and punishment in childhood. Whatever you felt earned you approval from those around you became the ego you act out continuously. Whatever earned you punishment and disapproval became the rejected parts of yourself that you have since judged and found unworthy.

The ego is not a monster to be destroyed.

The ego is a child to be retaught.

Love your ego!

Your ego is simply the natural part of yourself that wants to be judged as good and right. The part that wants to feel worthy, and wanted.

We all have experiences of rejection as children. We have experiences where we are made to feel that we are unwanted and unworthy. These experiences fuel a deep unshakable desire to do whatever it takes to make others like us, to look good, and to do it right.

The fear of experiencing these same rejections again is what fuels the ego to protect us from such pain by sticking to the things it learned were reason for praise and avoid what it learned was reason for dismissal or rejection.

As a child, what earned you praise or punishment? Were you taught to always be humble and therefore developed an ego eager to feel inferior? Where you praised for being the best and developed an ego eager to put others beneath you? 

How do you make friends with your ego?

First, LOVE your ego as it is the most innocent part of your being, scared, and asking only for love and belonging. This part of you is still that little child who wanted nothing more in the world than the approval of your tribe.

Once you have befriended your ego and seen him/her as just another part of you seeking love you can begin to reteach your ego what behaviors earn praise. Use your ego as a tool instead of a weapon by embracing its deep unshakable desire to do things right and earn approval. Give yourself approval consistently to feed your inner child/ego and curve the need to seek such approval elsewhere.

If you teach your ego that vulnerability is how you earn praise and love you will no longer feel fear but eagerness to be vulnerable when the opportunity arises.

If you teach your ego that failure is a milestone proving your dedication and therefore worth in whatever endeavor, then you will no longer fear failure but embrace it as a badge of imminent success.

If you teach your ego that success with earn you praise and belonging you will no longer fear success.

Think about your greatest fear now.

What experiences did you have where the thing you are afraid of led to pain and suffering?

What experiences have you had since where the same thing has brought love instead of pain?

Reteach yourself by seeking out the evidence that what you fear IS your very path to love and belonging.

It is okay to want approval. It is okay to want love. It is okay to want to belong and feel wanted. It is okay to seek attention from others. It is okay to seek praise from others.

Every single human being alive wants these things.

My vision is a world where we give approval, love, belonging, attention, and praise freely and are therefore free to receive.

Will you join me in creating this world?

It starts by giving these things to yourself, not once, but everyday!


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